Exude confidence with your carriage!

My most favorite Edward Degas painting, “Dancers in Pink,” is a treasure featured in the Living Room at the Hill Stead Museum in Farmington, Connecticut.

With the constant use of face masks in public, the art of smiling with your eyes has become perfected as our adapted manner of communicating without facial smiles being visible!  I think of a smile as a kind acknowledgment of someone’s presence. Now, my eyes have to perform double-time with a mask on! 

Another way to silently communicate, and quite effectively with or without masks, is the art of standing straight, aka the art of deportment. The way we carry ourselves relays grace with our poise and carriage. Did you listen to your Mum when she said, “Stand straight, pull your shoulders back!”? I have flashbacks of the movie, The Titanic, at teatime, where a mother gestured to her daughter to sit up straight and not touch the chair with her back. While we are not as formal as in that scenario, good posture is still considered a sign of good-breeding and a secret code handed down from mothers (and fathers) to their daughters and sons. This gesture is equivalent to the significance of a firm handshake and a “how do you do?”  It is a silent signal of confidence, polish, and grace. 

While attending a tea in NYC, a lovely young lady approached me to chat. Instinctively, I admired her posture and the elegant way she held her head high and her neck straight; she was incredibly graceful. After a while, I inquired if she had been a dancer. It was no surprise to learn that she had performed ballet in an international arena. Her walk and stance were poised, effortless, and not exaggerated in any way. She appeared confident and elegant. Her refinement inspired me straight away. I began to stand taller! Good posture can be pleasantly contagious to those around you. 

While working at home during Covid at a desk, table, or even on a sofa, it is quite easy to ignore our posture. Consider being conscious of your carriage today. Make a concerted effort to walk taller and sit with an elegant purpose. Go out with a mask on, smiling eyes, and the awareness of a newly inspired finesse to your carriage. Good posture is commensurate to wearing a beautiful outfit; it conveys a tenacity and self-assured spirit!   

We have to admit, our mothers were right all along with their proper prodding! The lesson learned is to stand tall.  Pay this lesson forward.   And, oh, by the way, are your shoulders back?! 

Oh, joy! I just was informed by the charming and creative Director of the Hill Stead Museum, Anna Swinbourne, that they will be collaborating with the Ballet Theatre Company to create a brilliant reimagining of the Nutcracker on the carriage porch, which will have a dance floor installed in it. The dancers will perform for 25-30 minute excerpts, from the full ballet, inside the glassed-in walls, while the visitors, safely spaced, will watch from the outside, as they sip hot chocolate… visions of looking at your very own snow globe. I am pirouetting! From Nov. 28 to December 20th, 2020, peek at www.hillstead.org to discover more details.

Grandmillennial Tips:

A dear friend of mine, a noted plastic surgeon, remarked that this generation of cell phone users are continually gazing down.  This action will begin to take its toll on their necks. The remedy is to hold your phone up in front of your eyes, not below them. This technique may seem strange at first, but you will begin to notice the difference in your posture and you will save your neck from aging prematurely. That free advice is a golden nugget, right? 

The same is applicable for your computer screen. Boost it upward so that your eyes are looking to the center of the screen. My computer screen is now on top of a stack of Sotheby’s and Christie’s catalogs, which work brilliantly to save my neck... and my pocketbook!

Elegant Earrings... For Your Walls?!

Our living room at Fox Hall features a pair of antique, Italianate gilded wall brackets on either side of our painting of a terrier. We discovered the painting at a gallery in Prague, and our children all voted to buy it. To this day, it is one of their favorite pieces! Mummy found the antique pair of Chinese porcelain jars in Hong Kong back in the 1960’s, and I think the graceful curves of the brackets complement the curves of the porcelain.

A pair of lovely wall brackets will enhance any wall... in any type of interior!

In my Lessons for Lovely Living, decorative wall brackets seem like an appropriate topic to discuss at the beginning of November. I am steering away from our national election issues, and instead will focus on home sweet home! This time of year, quite fittingly, many wish to spruce up interior areas for the upcoming holidays, even during Covid times.

The Canton porcelain pieces, which flank either side of a portrait of my grandfather, required rather large wall brackets!

Use your imagination, and join me in envisioning wall brackets as pretty drop-earrings that adorn a wall! Wall brackets are stands that support three-dimensional artwork such as porcelain pieces, sculptures, clocks, and even candlestick holders. They have graced interiors in Europe for centuries. A charming pair of 1760-80, gilded shell wall brackets from England even embellish the front parlor of George Washington’s Mount Vernon. Wall brackets are my go-to for enhancing a wall space inside of Fox Hall, and for my clients.

This pair is based on an 18th-century design and are hand carved with an antique gold gilt. Scully and Scully offer some lovely options.

Wall brackets give dimension to a wall. If purchased in pairs (highly recommended!), they add glorious symmetry when placed on either side of a featured piece of artwork or a looking glass (mirror). I refer to them in my book, The Pretty & Proper Living Room. Wall brackets come in all sizes, shapes, and forms. They can be made of gilded wood, stone, plaster, acrylic, and other media forms.

Like picture frames, wall brackets should complement the object they hold, and the room they are displayed within. When you discover a pretty pair, my recommendation is to buy them! My husband and I purchased a set of four gilded brackets from the Mario Buatta sale at Sotheby’s in NYC, and they are patiently waiting to be appointed to a wall in Fox Hall!

While shopping for a client in Palm Beach, I spied these fun and attractive acrylic wall brackets at the store HIVE.

Grandmillennial Tips:

When you have a piece of porcelain, such as a vase or a Chinese ginger jar, and wish to display it on a wall bracket, remember to measure the widest point, as the widest point will push the piece away from the wall, sometimes further than just the base. It may require a larger shelf surface, necessary for the item to appropriately fit. I once purchased a rather buxom pair of Canton vases. It was a challenge to find a large enough shelf on the wall bracket to place them on, but eventually, I found a pair! 

From overzealous, dusting endeavorist housekeepers, to slamming doors, remember to use some “museum putty” under the pieces displayed to keep them in place on the wall brackets. 

 There is nothing like pretty earrings to finish off an elegant outfit, so let your imagination go wild with the array of possibilities of what to display on your wall brackets! There are endless options. Look around your house for a pair of “something pretty” and ponder… are they wall bracket-worthy?!

Forbidden Faux Pas:

No-no: To hang a pair of wall brackets too high when used to grace either side of a piece of artwork!

No-no: Try not to only center the wall bracket on the piece of art, but instead, center the entire composition of both the wall bracket and the item that is placed upon it. If anything, the composition can be hung a scant lower than dead center of the artwork.

Another Use For Your “Guardian” Staffordshire Dogs!

Please, Do Come In!

A little hand-written note like this is a thoughtful way to let your party guests know that they may enter the house and not wait outside until someone answers the door!

As always, I am grateful for your subscribership to MMM!  Thank you for your thoughtful questions.  They serve to inspire me for new topics, like this one, which I received last week:

“If you are hosting a bridal shower or the like, and someone says they’d like a tour of your house… what do you say?  It seems very rude, to me, to ask such a thing.  Am I wrong in thought??  I’d love YOUR thoughts on this.”

While it may be considered impolite to pose such a question, it can also be interpreted as a compliment to the homeowner!  Keep in mind that your darling guests are not trying to offend you; quite the opposite.  You have created a beautiful and inviting house, and they only wish to see more, as odd as that might seem. But, if you choose not to take them on a tour, my suggested responses are: 

“I was so focused on preparing for this event that I am afraid the rest of the house is not ready for a tour today, but perhaps another time?!” 

“I cannot show you that area of the house today, but let me show you… the verandah!”

A similar situation: Our former nanny is now married and living in a grand house on a lake outside of Minneapolis.  It still boasts the reputation of the famous owner who had previously lived there.  When she hosts large cocktail fundraising events, inevitably, guests are inquisitive and begin to stray away on their own to explore areas she would prefer them not to venture into.  She asked me how to discourage guests, whom she doesn’t know, from wandering about and exploring bedrooms. 

I, too, can relate to this situation.  Before Covid, when hosting fundraising events at Fox Hall (when I may not personally know all of the guests), on a few occasions I have glanced up the staircase to see a rogue guest on their way up to the Ballroom, inviting themselves to discover it on the third floor!

While I adore sharing the history of our 1803 house and giving tours, I invite guests to join me on a tour on my timeframe, when I can accompany them.

A few Staffordshire dogs work well as a deterrent during large, fundraising events... as long as Miss Zsa Zsa doesn’t try to eat them or play with them as fellow canines!

One way to discourage wandering guests is to hang a small ribbon across the stairway or place two chairs in the hallway with a ribbon tied between them.  Placing a vase with flowers on the floor or on a table in the center of a doorway is also an attractive deterrent.  Sometimes I even like to assemble a few porcelain pieces, such as my ‘fur-ocious’ Staffordshire dogs, on one of the staircase steps. Guests instinctively understand what these attractive “roadblocks” are meant to indicate… well, hopefully, they will!  

I am interested to hear what discreet “roadblocks” you have used and which ones have worked well for you?

My husband, Stuart, moved the pumpkin to the center of our front door momentarily, while he was potting the two holly bushes. I looked at it and thought this may be a subtle way to display the pumpkin on Halloween to indicate no trick-or-treating during this crazy Covid time.

Grandmillennial Tip:

The opposite of keeping guests out of certain areas is to invite them to come in!  When hosting a party, I place a small note on the unlocked front door which reads: “Please, do come in!”  I try not to have guests standing outside waiting for someone to open the door, especially with the inclement weather in New England! 

If you watch the Netflix series, Emily in Paris, in Season 1, Episode 8, Emily visits a lovely family chateau in Reims, the Champagne region of France. Upon meeting the Madame, Emily says, “Oh, the chateau is so beautiful, I’d love a tour!” The response from Madame was, "We don’t give tours of the chateau, we live here! If you’d like a vineyard tour there is one in 30 minutes." 

P.S.  I received several inquiries about the wall paint color for the "porcelain wallpaper" in our Butler's Pantry. It is a flat latex, in Benjamin Moore #805 ‘New York City State of Mind!'

Ever consider having “porcelain wallpaper?”

The Butler's Pantry at Fox Hall is now adorned with various blue and white plates. Mummy purchased the large round platter, over the coat closet door, when we lived in Taipei, and trust me, it weighs a ton!

If you’re an avid collector of china patterns, such as myself, you’d agree that one can never have too many china designs.  Plates, platters, service pieces, oh my!   Like me, if you have a penchant for collecting various sets of china, it can be a challenge to find ample storage space for them. Fortunately, many historic, or turn-of-the-century houses, have Butler’s Pantries designated for this purpose.  Even so, what do you do if you are challenged with a lack of space to store your acquired stacks of pretty plates?

Here is part of the answer!  First, let me share a short story… 

The week before Lady Carnarvon flew over from Highclere Castle, aka Downton Abbey, to attend a luncheon I hosted on my verandah at Fox Hall for 45 ladies, the plumber came to change the faucet in the laundry room, located just above our Butler’s Pantry.  He neglected to turn off the water main… old house, old pipes!  Yes, indeed.  The pipes broke and water instantly gushed through the ceiling, ruining the Butler’s Pantry cabinets, floor, and beyond.  A temporary ceiling was installed a day before the party, not that I was inviting anyone in to see the disaster area, but because the show must go on!  

New cabinetry was designed, which offered a vast amount of new storage space for more plates.  Hmmm, a silver lining in that black cloud, right?  I was on the search for a replacement wallpaper too. My vision was to have a blue and white Canton porcelain design, but as each wallpaper sample arrived, while pretty, none were quite right. 

In a pinch, days before another dinner party, I had the walls painted a deep blue.  When I stored all of the china away during the renovation, I discovered some old boxes with stacks of blue and white plates that were long forgotten!  It was an ah-ha moment!  I would make my own wallpaper design out of china plates.  In essence, I hung plates all over the painted walls as a faux wallpaper design.  And that is what I refer to as my “porcelain wallpaper.”  It features a charming dimension and authentic sheen that only plates can achieve!  Dinner on the wall, anyone? 

Fox Hall has the original "Butler's call-box," pictured in the center. When the ringers are pressed from various rooms, the little arrows dance back and forth. The children used to push the call buttons in their bedrooms, hoping the butler would magically appear. I imagine he must have been hard of hearing!

Grandmillennial Tips:

If you inherit an abundance of plates, platters, or saucers, or when you spy a box of plates for sale at an estate or church sale, think “porcelain wallpaper” in a kitchen, Butler’s Pantry, laundry room, or even in a bathroom!   Not that we are all entertaining during COVID, but we do have the time to re-design and decorate while repurposing pieces we already own.

Hang plates on your cabinet doors, unless you have a heavy-handed family! It works well in the Butler's Pantry, and I was able to display the Meissen cobalt blue plates that I never used, and Mummy's Imari plates, too. Over the window are some antique tiles that my daughter, Alexandra, purchased in England and gave to me. Do not hesitate to mix and match patterns, shapes, and sizes, as long as the color theme is consistent.

Plate hangers are available at any hardware store or online on Amazon.  I also use a dab of posterboard putty to hold them in place.

Extraordinary French decorative arts and porcelains are displayed in the many well-appointed rooms at Hillwood Estate.

Treat yourself to a visit to the Hillwood Estate, Marjorie Merriweather Post’s home, heiress to the Post cereal fortune, in Washington D.C.  Mrs. Post was not only an avid collector but one of Washington’s most exalted and admired hostesses of her time.  To put her hostess adroitness in perspective, her other house was Mar-a-Lago in Palm Beach.  Yes, she could entertain on a rawwther grand scale!  Observing her vast collection of stunningly remarkable porcelain service pieces, as they peeked through the glass cabinet doors in the Butler’s Pantry, I left with an indelible impression and could relate to her appreciation for pretty plates.  Put this venue on your “must-visit” the next time you are in Washington.

What Does Your China Say About You?

Break Out Mummy's China! 

Collecting various china patterns through the years has been a joy. My two favorite colors have obviously attracted my eye: pink and cobalt blue! Mummy's white Wedgwood is next to my grandmother’s floral Bavarian plate, pictured in the center.

One of my sweet subscribers, Nikki, wrote to me after reading last week's topic of choosing a color and theme to build upon: 

“My Southern belle mother always said that the lady of the house should decorate the dining room in her most flattering color.  At the table, she is the star of the evening and the walls behind her are her stage.  To this day, the walls of my dining room are the same shade of green as my eyes.  I always feel more confident and prettier in that room!” 

What a lovely observation! This inspired me to write about your choice in china, because china patterns serve to accent and flatter your dining room, and you, too.  China designs are a splendid way to mirror your personality, complement an occasion, and enhance a dining experience!  Observing the china pattern a hostess chooses for an event is tantamount to reading tea leaves; it tells so much in a delightfully subtle way. 

When I was a twenty-one-year-old bride, Mummy suggested that I choose a white set of china, one that could cross over from informal to formal. My parents moved around to various places in the world every two or three years, so she spoke from experience.  Her solid ivory-white Wedgwood pattern would dovetail into the dining room color scheme she was greeted with and could harmonize with any occasion, floral arrangement, or country.  My word, I don’t know how she did it, but she would host a formal dinner party within a week of moving into a new domicile! 

I have collected many patterns, but I continue to use her Wedgewood, along with her pretty floral Bavarian porcelain plates, which she inherited from her mother. Now, the same floral plates (in the center of the above photograph) grace my springtime dinner parties at Fox Hall.

When selecting your china patterns, think about the colors and themes that make you happy!  My daughter, Alexandra, adores her Herend Chinese Bouquet in Raspberry, and my other daughter, Caroline, chose Haviland Parlon Syracuse in Turquoise. Again, these represent their favorite colors that they use for both their wardrobe and interiors.

I have been asked if one can appropriately mix patterns during the same dining event. Mummy taught me that a salad course or dessert course is the optimal time to slip in a different china pattern, as long as it complements the overall scheme of the table and dinner plate pattern. I collect various plates just for this purpose, to add variety and shake it up a bit, versus using a matchy-matchy set throughout the dinner party.

Is there a difference between formal and informal?  Indeed! To me, the quality of the porcelain and the amount of gold embellishment on a plate is what contributes to the formality of the design.  When I first started my interior design business, I was invited to design a formal dining room for the Junior League of Hartford’s Showhouse, so I asked Tiffany & Company to collaborate with me. I chose an exquisitely formal pattern: Royal Copenhagen’s Flora Danica porcelain plates. To this day, it is my most beloved, formal pattern. Take a quick tour with me in the bridal registry at Scully and Scully, Park Avenue, NYC. 

Grandmillennial Tips:

Consider buying sets of china at auction, where your dollars will go much further. From a few plates to extensive porcelain sets, when purchasing at auction, plates tend to sell for a mere fraction of what the retail cost would be… even Flora Danica! 

During COVID, grand scale dinner parties certainly are not an option. But, may I suggest for your dinner tonight, or breakfast tomorrow, take out your prettiest plates? Begin to use them more often than just for special occasions. Whatever you serve, it will taste better, I promise!  

Welcome to our new sponsor!  

How delightful to discover a source for darling, traditionally designed clothes for my eight grandchildren! The clothing collection at Yellow Lamb is made with exceptional fabrics and can be passed down for generations to come. Adorable, well-made, and traditional are attributes that I admire. I just spied a “fox designed” dress… I wonder if they make it in my size?! 

Pearls of Design: What color and theme represent you?

When entertaining a large gathering, I utilize the space under the “Mene” bronze sculpture of horse and jockey by placing our collection of Fox-head goblets and derby cups. Mint juleps, anyone?

It has been said that one will meet a handful of people in their life who will share their magnanimous advice or touch one’s life in an impactful way, even though it may seem insignificant at the time. 

After 45 years of marriage, and after recently celebrating the wedding of a dear friend, I was inspired to share with you the advice that a dear friend, Marie deButts, gave me when I was a young bride. We met at the Deep Run Hunt Club, outside of Richmond, Virginia. She was twenty years older and I admired everything about her. On our long, glorious rides, I asked questions and relished her answers. We discussed everything, from how she furnished her plantation, to what design advice served Marie well. Here are two pieces of advice that I took to heart. Nothing earth-shattering, but in reality, these have impacted my life in a most positive way, which is the reason I am sharing them with you. Please share them too if you know of a young lady or gentleman just starting out!  

COLOR:  

Marie said to choose one, or possibly two, colors that you love to wear and build on them. Your entire wardrobe will blend well together forever, and the color you choose will become your trademark. Her color was red.  Well, you already know my color.  I love pink as much today as I did as a bride! From shoes to handbags, accessories, coats, and dresses, pink and green reign in my dressing room closet.

The same holds true for the colors in one’s house. Mummy loved cobalt blue, which I have also incorporated in various aspects of design in Fox Hall, from blue and white Chinese rugs to Canton porcelain, and a pastel blue bedroom. When my husband and I had a portrait commissioned of our children, they were dressed in tones of blue, which would have complemented just about any room at Fox Hall. While one of my daughters adores coral and turquoise, the other one is attracted to shades of yellows and pinks, which are incorporated in their wardrobes and interiors.

Atop our Hepplewhite mahogany card table is a collection of Meissen vases and Imari porcelain, placed under the English oil painting by Edwin Fox. This is another nod to the cobalt blue theme in our front hall.

THEME: 

Marie’s prudent tidbit of advice was to include design elements that you adore, and make them a theme to build upon in your house. She had a “running horse” gold belt buckle that enhanced her outfits. I was inspired and thought to myself, horses and foxes,  perhaps by osmosis, or by my ancestors who definitely passed the horse obsession gene along to me. Thank heavens my darling husband, Stuart, has supported my interest in British sporting art, silver foxes, hunt scene breakfast porcelain and accessories, and an 1803  house named Fox Hall!  

In my television series, I spoke about the porcelain room at Blenheim Palace, which features retired porcelain patterns.  Having one room dedicated to one theme is another way to give your house a unique and enchanting detail.

What speaks to your heart?  Whatever theme you choose, it will subtly give an insightful glimpse to others about your life experiences, travels, personality and it will tell your story. A house filled with good stories is rich with authentic patina, adding to its enchantment to others, and is rewarding to your eyes, too! 

(And Marie, I thank you for your advice and I  hope that you are galloping through the clouds of heaven on your handsome grey horse!)

The front hall at Fox Hall features my grandmother's cobalt blue Chinese rug which I inherited. Notice in the far corner is “Team Holden,” an antique bronze piece from Normandy, which we purchased in Paris. It gives us great joy and serves as a happy memento each morning as we descend the staircase.

Part II: My Interview With David P. Columbia!

This is the team that created the New York Social Diary, David P. Columbia and Jeff Hirsch. They have been working together for over twenty-two years, yet never in the same building together!

May I pour you another sip of fine wine and share another portion of my interview with David Patrick Columbia (DPC)?  Who knows, perhaps I will write even more at another point in time. Hopefully, after my incessant nudging to David to write his biography, he will someday. As you can imagine, he has a plethora of life experiences to share with the world.  David openly shared a glimmer with me, so that I may whisper them to you.
 

Holly:  Given all the brilliant parties you have attended in your life, does one sparkle in your memory bank more than any of the others?

David: One of the greatest dinner parties that I have ever attended in my life was hosted by Edie Goetz in LA.  Why?  Because it was perfect in every way!   Edith “Edie” Mayer Goetz hosted legendary dinners at her ‘Holmby Hills’ mansion, which was the epicenter of Hollywood for over twenty years. She was the “Queen of Hollywood!” The saying was, “What Edie wants, Edie gets!” Her father, Louis B. Mayer, built MGM into the most prestigious studio during Hollywood's golden age. Her sister, Irene, married Gone With the Wind producer and studio executive, David O. Selznick. And Edie's husband, Bill, ran 20th Century Fox, and then Universal-International.

Holly: I read that Edie had over sixty Impressionist paintings, which echoed the smooth elegance of her persona. 

David:  Edie had a beautiful house.  I don’t know how many there were numbers-wise but they filled the walls of her library, Living Room, Dining Room and entrance gallery, and her bedroom. Over the fireplace was a van Gogh self-portrait. The pastel interiors were designed by actor-turned-decorator William Haines.  She never discussed the interiors of the house, ever. That was because they were intended to look like her natural choices and collections. She created a social atmosphere that was very proper, with staff and chefs, which complemented the elegant decor of her house. It was a beautiful environment; it was very, very special.

Holly:  In your eyes, what was it that Edie did that made her such an exceptional hostess?

David:  When you went to her house, no matter who you were, if you were invited to be her guest, everyone was treated exactly the same, with the same respect and the same welcome.  At her house, everyone was treated well, very comfortably and very equally. No one got more attention than anyone else, even the movie stars.  Everyone was equal.  Quite simply, everyone at Edie’s table was a guest of Edie before they were anything else. And everybody treated each other that way too!  Cary Grant was actually just like David P. Columbia at the table because we were Madam’s guests.   

Holly:  How did the evening evolve? 

David: Guests arrived promptly at 7:30 in the evening… you arrived on time! The food was perfect, the service was perfect, the timing was perfect, and it felt very easy... she entertained you. Drinks were served in the library. After drinks, one crossed the Living Room to the Dining Room. Dinner was presented superbly in a candlelit dining room which glowed all over, the food had the reputation as being the best in LA, and it was impeccably served. Her butler came from the Royal Household. They were not called Butlers in England, but instead, Footmen and they served in all the royal households — Clarence House, Buck House, Windsor, Balmoral, etc. Edie’s staff were local people except for the butler and the chef — those two were top of the market. 

Afterward, the evening concluded with a  screening in the Living Room. The screen was concealed in the ceiling until the process of screening began. It was surreal. Watching a film and sitting amongst the actors in the movie. And then, she said good night. Her sister, Irene, once wrote, “Entertaining became her career.”

(I am only telling you the tip of the iceberg of this stunning story… David, please write your biography for all of us to savor!)

Holly:  As a thoughtful hostess, ‘charm’ to me is an essential factor, as charm contributes to making your guests feel comfortable.  How do you describe real charm?

David: I found out early on in life, real charm is when people feel comfortable around you. You make people feel comfortable around you by being polite, by paying attention, and by being kind, even under circumstances where kindness is not the first choice!  Because I am “nice,” I have had many opportunities to see, hear, and experience. Maybe not opportunities to make a lot of money, but opportunities to move around and make the most of whatever I have! 

Holly:  Do you think your background as a child contributed to your natural charm?

David: I came from a different world. We were poor; we were sub, not near the top. But because of my father’s early background in the 1920s and 1930s of being a chauffeur for the rich and famous, and because of my mother’s curiosity, I learned about the top and I pursued that. By the time I came along (the last of my father’s children) that was all PAST and memory.  I found the way to pursue it was to always be nice, and to overlook those who are not.  When people are not nice, I still remain nice, not phony.  It is actually to protect myself, and it provides opportunities because it makes it easier for other people to relate to you.  

Holly: We both have the same affinity for dogs! How many do you have now?

David: I have four dogs and a big soft spot for Shih Tzus.  The real reason animals are good for you is because the way they make YOU feel… good! The way you feel about them, which is basically unconditional, is the best feeling in life.  It is the feeling of love.  You feel for them, and it is THAT feeling that makes you feel good.  The same for the feelings of others, it makes you feel good!

David hit upon the notes that I believe contribute to creating a meaningful life, including treating one another equally and understanding the essence of real charm.

He said to me, “My office is my Living Room. My life is at my desk.”  His stories and sage words of advice reminded me of the love he gives his four dogs… it makes us all feel good!

Thank you David for writing your clever chronicle about the social, historical, and cultural life of NYC. And, thank you, Jeff, for being the other clever half of NYSD. David told me, "Jeff is as much responsible for the NYSD as I am. I couldn’t have done it without his talent and eye and vice versa. He’s the one who makes it all look so good people want to read it!”


P.S.  You are invited to send this along to others you know who may also enjoy an insight into the background of NYSD and will be inspired to subscribe!

The New York Social Diary! Meet David Patrick Columbia!

Who is the mastermind behind THE New York Social Diary?  David P. Columbia!

Looking as dapper as ever, David Patrick Columbia embodies the essence of New York society with his clever wit and positive attitude. 

The nature of social journalism is people interested in other people!  In 2000, David Patrick Columbia (DPC) created his legendary, weekly online newsletter, the New York Social Diary (NYSD) where he has cleverly chronicled the social, historical, and cultural life of NYC. People have aspirations and want to be inspired! There is a fine line between having a gossip publication and a socially informative one, the latter of which is the essence of NYSD. I regard his writing as a fine wine. It tastes like velvet and has subtle but complex nuances from mastering the art of its blending and aging, with just the right touch of intrigue.  With one sip, you’ll only want more!  

I found out first hand that David is a genius at storytelling. Imagine that! Our interview lasted two hours, but it felt like two minutes! Here is the first half of our chat together. Next week's newsletter will continue with even more delicious stories.

A little DPC background:
At a very early age, David was intrigued and enamored with the lifestyle of NYC, which had the reputation of being glamorous, and completely different than his very modest Westfield, MA upbringing. He begged for a dollhouse and fantasized that he lived in that perfect house.  At age six, he read the social column in the newspaper that his father brought home. At age 11, David saw an ad for a Smith Corona typewriter, which he desperately wanted.  His mother bought it for him, even though it was very expensive for their family.

He went on to Colby College, where he won $100 in a writing contest. He didn’t finish college but decided to take his money and go to NYC at age 19 to become a writer. He had only been there three times in his life, once to a coming-out party, which had quite an influence on him.  A friend offered David her mother’s apartment until he found a place to live. It just happened to be at 740 Park Ave, a 16 room duplex, where he lived, rather lavishly, for the first 8 months! This experience showed him the side of life that he had only imagined as a child.

Young David with his elder sister, Helen, in their hometown of Westfield, Massachusetts. 

All of his life he has been a writer but has never thought of himself as a professional writer.

Holly: Did your mother have a positive influence on you? 
David: My mother had a huge influence on me!  She read to me every night and told me many stories about her life, which was filled with hardships, and that is probably why I am a writer today. 

Holly: Was your mother a stickler about certain aspects of your life, and about etiquette?  
David: Everything! She was a Virgo… asking me, “Did you wash your face?” when I was age 16… really, mother?!  We were brought up to have manners.  When I was growing up, we were taught manners on how to behave, and get along with people. “Thank you” and “please” are there so that we can speak to one another. Even in the animal world, manners are taught by their mothers who teach them what they can and cannot do!  Etiquette almost does not exist anymore… children are not taught it. Etiquette is a navigational tool, and what one uses to move smoothly in life, and around each other.  (My, did that resonate with me!) 

Holly: I admire how you do not disparage people in NYSD. There is a fine line between a gossip publication and a socially informative one, as the reputation of NYSD. 
David: If it is an interview, I ask questions… anything I want to ask. But if I am invited as a guest to your table, and I really don’t know you, I do not intrude on your privacy with any kind of questions.

A DPC story: 
A few years ago, David was invited to lunch at Lee Radziwill’s (sister of Jacqueline Kennedy) apartment. After a lovely time, she mentioned that she was curious about something. “In NYSD,  you never say anything bad about anybody.” She wanted to know why.  David’s response was, “Why would I? Frankly, what is in it for me, David the writer, if I am saying something bad about someone? I don’t want to have an argument with anybody. I don’t want to have an enemy or any of those things. I don’t look for that. I can see it, obviously, when it is there.  I am well aware of things you can say that are bad about people, but I look for the positive in people. That is what we have to live off of and go on.  At my later age, I see that the so-called negative things are always there, and will always be there with all of us.  But the things that are really important are positive.”

Holly:  You eventually left NYC and moved to LA.  What brought you back to the East Coast?
David: I was asked to write a book about Bobby Short. (An American cabaret singer and composer.)

A DPC story:
At age 51, David left LA, and on his drive back to NYC to write a book, he asked himself this question: “Let’s say... if you have to live in NYC and write to make a living, and if you could do anything you wanted, what would you like to do?”  David then said to himself, “I would like to write a social column! Well, nobody knows me. The world has changed, social columns don’t even exist, so don’t get your hopes up. But, just know, if you could have it, you would want it!”  

He went to a cocktail party at the Chanel store in NYC and met a little English lady, Heather Cohane, who in 1986 founded Quest magazine, which was basically a real estate magazine that had some social stories in it. She knew of David’s writing and asked if he would like to write a piece for Quest, about a woman from Philadelphia who was reared in Boston and grew up with the Cushing sisters, Babe Paley, Betsey Whitney, and Minnie Astor.  He did and after he wrote a few more pieces, Heather asked, “Would you like to write a column?” David did, and named it the New York Social Diary! 

Fast forward: David became the editor of Avenue Magazine (one of Manhattan’s oldest society magazines featuring the elite) and still wrote his column too. He knew there would be an audience on the internet someday because the internet would be everywhere.  He said, “I once lived in “everywhere,” and I know how interesting NYC is to “everywhere.”  

So, on August 15, 2000, he gave notice and left Avenue to launch his new website, which he started with Jeff Hirsh, who had begun working with him as his assistant and as a talented photographer at Avenue when he was 21. With Jeff’s help, who also left Avenue, they launched the first NYSD online in September 2000, with no sponsors.  At first, they published 2-3 times a week but realized that to make an impression, they would have to post five days a week, which they did by the end of that year, and have done so together ever since, for twenty years. 

Holly:  Who would you say your audience is? 
David: Our audience is basically over 40, and 60% of them are women.  We are a “reading” publication. The younger generations don’t read, and they are not curious.  Life is all about learning! It is everything! Go into a restaurant, and they are just looking at their phones. The world has changed, and the audience has changed.  

There is no social life in NYC now.  Much of NYC’s social life is built around philanthropy, galas, getting involved with the cause. What I try to write about now under COVID is how important it is to be around each other. We are social creatures.  Wearing a mask and staying in the house, not being with people, or even on the phone or Zoom, is not the same as a human relationship. We need human relationships to live, which is required as a creature! People need to be with people.

TO BE CONTINUED! Please, join me for the second half of my interview with DPC on next week's MMM.  Find out David’s explanation of “real charm” and how to make people feel comfortable. Be privy to one of the greatest dinner parties he has ever attended in his life which he said was,  “A perfect party in every way!”

P.S.  You are invited to send this along to others you know who may also enjoy an insight into the background of NYSD!

Holly Holden's Pet Etiquette

Dogs and cats are not always a welcome sight for your guests!  

This is sweet little, but very naughty, Miss Zsa Zsa, our fourth English Jack Russell terrier. They are “terrors,” but adorable!  Photo credit: Gabriella Narus

“Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails.”  -Max Eastman, American Author

As long as I can remember, four-legged furry animals have always made my heart go ‘pitter-patter’ with happiness and joy!  Oh, the random treasures that I brought home to my unsuspecting parents. How did they ever put up with me?  Once, during a piano lesson in Taipei, I heard a kitten crying outside of the window.  After my lesson, I walked outside and found the kitten in a brown paper bag “thrown out.”  Yes, tiny “Ribsy” came home to live with us and turned out to be a stunning Calico cat, who teased our dog, Mischief, unmercifully.  I have always been fortunate enough to have a dog, and I cannot imagine life without one. 

“I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me, they are the role model for being alive.”  -Comedienne Gilda Radner

Recently, Stuart and I celebrated our 45th anniversary! (Yes, I was a child bride... just kidding!)  We were invited to bring our dog, Miss Zsa Zsa, to the house we were going to visit soon after. We chose not to for a few reasons, which inspired me to write about the topic of pets.  

“Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen.” -Orhan Pamuk

Maybe it was this precious illustration that I had in my bedroom as a child that captured my heart and made Jack Russells so dear to me.

Pet Guests: Not that many of us have houseguests these days due to COVID, but should you be a houseguest and are invited to bring your pet, there are a few courtesies for you to consider:

• Inquire where the animal should stay in the house before arriving. Either bring a kennel cage and blanket, or a baby-gate, as needed.  

• It is rawwwther presumptuous to ask if your pet can sleep in the bed with you, as the host/hostess may not want pet hair or dander in their guest room or on their beautiful linens. If they offer for you to do so, be respectful of their house by minding your pet. 

• Along with the food you pack for your dog or cat, bring along bowls for their food and water. Don’t expect to use the pretty porcelain at the house you are visiting. 

• Bring a leash to walk your dog and pick up after them.

“A house is not a home until it has a dog.” -Gerald Durrell

“Oops, the vase fell over, but I can still smell the flowers!”

For guests visiting a house with pets: If you invite a guest into your home, for any occasion, ask them these two questions either at the door, or preferably in advance of their arrival:  Are you allergic to animals, and are you afraid of dogs or cats?  

The answers will make you conscious of what you must do with your pet… and if yes, to either question, put them away during their time in your house.   Do not assume that everyone loves animals, which is hard to believe for those of us who are avid animal lovers. I keep our dog in her “penthouse” until someone requests to see her.  Zsa Zsa, a Jack Russel, is a jumping-jack who cannot control her excitement when greeting someone! It is disconcerting for any guest to have a dog lick, jump, or shed on their clothes, especially on a black dress or dark suit pants.

“If you want a friend in Washington, D.C, get a dog.” -Former President Harry S. Truman

Grandmillennial Tip: 
If you have pets that you allow on your furniture, consider purchasing a few extra yards of fabric when you are having a piece upholstered or slipcovered.  With the extra yardage, have a throw designed to use on top.  When you place the throw on the furniture, it will “disappear” visually and can quickly be dry cleaned as needed, saving the upholstery fabric underneath undue wear, tear, and pet… fragrance!  It can even be quilted or have a decorative trim or pretty piping applied to the edges.

“If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.” -Actor Will Rogers

If your petite dog is allowed to hop on your sofa or sleep on your bed but requires a leg-up, consider buying a small antique or vintage chair or footstool to place next to it. It will be a darling little decorative accessory that will enable your dog to “hop-up” in style! 

“If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them.” -Author Phil Pastoret
 

If you have animal-loving friends, please invite them to join the MMM party, too! 

Sign up here!

“Pink always tastes better!”

Elegant Entertaining: Five Forbidden Faux Pas

Little nuances can make a big difference when creating a charming experience for your guests!  Here are a few no-no’s to know… the timeless secrets that Mummy shared with me.  They continue to hold true in the present day, and will for another generation of grandmillennials, too!

Each country has various traditions. These no-no’s, while in no particular order of significance, are worth being aware of in America. Some are in reference to old-school proper etiquette, and others are simply advice from years of entertaining. Mainly, these tidbits are what I call inherited gems. Take them or ignore them.  I’m grateful because knowing these no- no’s have served me very well. 

Per the request of several of my darling subscribers, I will continue sprinkling in a few of these FFPs as the topic in my future newsletters. They will all touch upon various aspects of gracious living. The word “forbidden” is used with a wink... I guess I like alliteration! Although I admit, the word “forbidden” did get the attention of my children when they were young!

Entertaining: Five Forbidden Faux Pas!

Making every party guest feel special is my goal as a hostess! Preparing for a party is similar to preparing for a show!  I strive to use meaningful details to create an ambiance that is unique and memorable! Shopping within the house for treasures to use on the table is truly like a treasure hunt... hummm, what will I discover behind this door?!

No-no:  To not have a “drinks table” within reach of each seated guest during cocktail hour or any type of seated gathering.  

What is done:  Be sure to have a surface, aka a  “drinks table,” within reach of each guest to be able to place their drink glasses upon, especially when seated. This is applicable for any room.  

Note: There is no need to have coasters!  The linen cocktail napkin you offer each guest can be used in place of a coaster. I think it is discreetly more elegant then asking your guest to try to fit their glass into or onto a designated coaster.  From my experience, coasters can actually make the glass tippy, especially if you are in a deep conversation and not acutely aware of where the coaster is while placing your glass upon it!

Candles on the table are not lit during the day, as seen on the table set for a late afternoon champagne reception I hosted to introduce my daughter-in-law to other ladies upon her arrival in Farmington!

No-no:  To light the candles on a dining room table before six in the evening, or before it is dark outside.  

What is done:  For breakfast or a luncheon, candlesticks may remain on the dining table, but the candles are not lit.  This follows the custom that candles were actually used for light!  

Note:  This tradition is not adhered to in other countries.  I find it charming to see a candle lit on the breakfast tables in cozy little restaurants in Germany!

No-no:  To place a fork on top of a dinner napkin.

What is done: The only time a fork goes on top of a napkin is when dining outside, because the wind may possibly blow the napkin away! If a fork is being presented for a meal, then it belongs on the left side of the plate position, or above the plate for dessert. The napkin is then placed to the left of the fork. 

By the way, a napkin may also be placed on top of a charger, dinner plate, or butter plate.

Having Chef Russell prepare his divine creations for a dinner party that we hosted for a museum function at Fox Hall, was, as always,  a delight!  And, I’m not cooking in the kitchen all day! 

No-no:  To clean dishes in the kitchen in between courses, or even after dinner, while your guests are still present. 
 
What is done: Dishes and glasses are cleaned after your guests have said their adieux and left!

 While guests are seated at the table, remove the appropriate plates after each course, and simply place them on the counter or in the sink.  There is no better way to tell your guests that you’re bored with them, or so fastidious that you can’t help yourself from cleaning, than to get up and wash the dishes between courses or after the dessert is served! It leaves a gaping hole at the table, conversations are interrupted, and besides that, the sound of the water running and dishes clinking in the kitchen adds to a very uncomfortable atmosphere. It hints to your guests that you secretly wish they were helping you clean dishes too, or that you wish they would leave!

Note: The above is applicable for hosts that do not have any help in the kitchen to assist in serving and cleaning. If you have help, discuss with them in advance of the party, that during dinner, everything that takes place in the kitchen must be very quiet, especially if they attempt to clean the dishes.  The goal is that no noise will be heard from the kitchen while guests are in the dining room.  
When we have help, my husband Stuart and I will ask our table guests to adjourn to the living room for after-dinner drinks, port, or coffee, so that the dishes and glasses may be cleared off of the table after everyone has left the dining room.

A spur of the moment Valentine's Day dinner for another couple was such fun! I found some angels that once belonged to my parents, and I arranged them in the center of the table. I placed a chocolate gift on the napkins of our guests - Cupid made me do it!  

No-no:  Neglecting to walk your guests to the door upon their departure. 

What is done:  Either the host or the hostess should make the effort to accompany a guest to the door upon their departure. If it is a single lady at night, it is most gallant to have the gentleman host, or even a gentleman guest, walk her to her car to be sure she is safe, or at least offer to do so.  

Note:  If it is a large party, it is acceptable for a guest to slip out without saying thank you and good-bye if they see that the hosts are busy with other guests.  The guest can always address this in their thank you note!  

These are only five FFPs gleaned from a more lengthy list, which I will share with you in future newsletters.  In the meantime, I would love to hear any Forbidden Faux Pas that your Mum was a stickler about… the ones that you’ll never forget, making certain that your children won’t forget either! So, do tell. 

PS. Oh, a little request! Would you kindly help me inspire others, worldwide, to subscribe? We have a noble following and I would be so grateful to you for sending this newsletter on to others. The world could use more gentility and kindness right now, wouldn’t you agree?

Be sure to sign up for the chance to win my NEW book Pearls of Palm Beach as a giveaway! It is my way of thanking you for being loyal subscribers- Cheers to YOU! The giveaway will close on September 25, 2020.

Sign up here!

What do you give the person who has everything?!

The loveliest and most meaningful gifts are bespoke!  A commissioned piece of art gives artistic freedom to create the vision you wish. This oil painting of Fox Hall was a gift I gave to my husband, Stuart, for his birthday.  Our two Jack Russells are now in “biscuit heaven”  but live on in the painting. I am wearing a pink gown that I designed for our elder daughter’s wedding reception in Berlin, Germany. In the sky, there are three stars of Orion’s Belt, representing our three children. Helen Galick was the artist, but sadly is longer taking commissions.

What do you give the person who has everything?!

Recently the question, “What do you give the person who has everything” was posed to me. Do you agree that a handmade or bespoke present can be the most meaningful kind of gift? I encourage my children and grandchildren not to buy a gift for me, but to make something instead. These are gifts from the heart, and the ones I cherish immensely. The same concept is applicable when giving a gift to an adult who has everything, wouldn’t you agree?  Just knowing the thought, effort, and love that went into customizing a present contributes to making it a treasure. In that vein, if my homemade Grand Marnier pecan pie does not fit the bill to celebrate a notable occasion, I have a go-to, more extravagant gift idea to share with you!  It is one that never seems to fail to give joy to the person who has everything: a custom piece of artwork, created just for them!

Our daughter, Caroline, painted this watercolor of our living room at Fox Hall to grace the introduction page of my first book, The Pretty and Proper Living Room. 

A custom watercolor, pen & ink rendering, or oil painting of the recipient’s house, garden, interior room, pet, bridal bouquet or something of significance, will be received and become a cherished gift!  I am writing about this now in reference to a house painting because gardens tend to be at their peak for flowers and green grass about this time of year, though Connecticut is in a drought, and the grass is brown!  Photographs of a house, taken by the artist or you, will enable the artist to better understand what the house looks like in the summer (unless you prefer to feature another season).  NOW is the time to commission an artist and take the necessary photographs, especially if you want the artwork completed by the Christmas holidays. This type of gift will be adored forever and ever, especially when created to commemorate a celebratory event such as an anniversary, birthday, marriage, or even a new house.

My parents commissioned this watercolor of my Austrian great-grandfather’s house, Nibelheim, in Tientsin, China. According to my father, who lived there, the artist painted it from a black and white photograph and created a splendid interpretation.

How to find an artist? Ask your friends or an art school for recommendations. I am delighted to share with you three very talented artists:

Emma Schuck is such a brilliant artist and also a joy to work with.  She is an Irish born designer who studied at the National College of Art and Design.  Upon graduation, she moved to America, where she worked at a textile design studio.  Emma is currently working as a custom watercolor artist.  Her Etsy shop features custom house portraits, bridal bouquets, and whatever her clients can dream up! Click here to view her website. 

Barbara Bellin’s artistic talent and love of architecture drive her passion for commemorating homes, interiors, and buildings. She’s painted over 800 homes, historic buildings, and museums around the world.  Barbara’s work has been featured in galleries across the East Coast, The Wall Street Journal, W Magazine, and other publications.  Click here to view her website. 

 Susan Stillman is an accomplished and award-winning artist who is known for her vibrant representations of homes.  Her work has been featured in hundreds of publications, including the New York Times and The Wall Street Journal. She has a BFA from Rhode Island School of Design, MFA from Brooklyn College and is a faculty member of Parsons New School of Design since 1983.  Click here to view her website. 

Grandmillennial Tips:

Have the artwork copied and made into fold-over notecards! They can be used to write notes or as lovely invitations.

Be sure that the artist you commission has a painting style that complements the style of the recipient’s interiors… traditional begets traditional!  

An alternative to giving a completed piece of artwork is introducing them to the artist and letting them create the artwork vision together. 

Keep the colors that are inside the house, or the colors that the recipient loves, in mind to share with the artist, who can then incorporate them  into the painting.  After all, the painting will be hung inside of the house! 

It may be best not to have the artwork framed in advance. I find that everyone has their own particular taste in frames. The recipient will decide where it will be hung, which may require a different style, color, or finish of a frame than what you would have chosen.

Forbidden Faux Pas:

To suggest to the recipient where to hang the painting! Let them choose what they want to do with it and where they want to hang it.  It may be quite different than what you have envisioned for it! 

PS. Please forward this email to anyone you think may be interested in this topic and hopefully, they will be inspired to subscribe!

Please meet our new sponsor - June St. George!

Interior designer Ally-Catherine wants you to create something that you love, and that will last a lifetime.  Her creations at June St. George helps weave together your past, present, and future into one stunning piece with beautifully embroidered decorative accessories! Ally- Catherine’s  Southern heritage and world travel inspire her to design custom pieces for her clients to celebrate their family and bespoke life.  She is committed to helping you create an heirloom design of your dreams in such a pretty and charming manner.

Holly’s five simple interior design tips to enhance your house, now!

Here I am standing in front of a Sir Joshua Reynolds painting (c.1785) on the first landing of the grand oak staircase at Highclere Castle, aka Downton Abbey. In my public television series filmed there, I discussed the use of brass stair rods. We can all learn from masterpiece houses.

Holly’s five simple interior design tips to enhance your house, now!

My interior design firm, Holly Holden & Company, Ltd. www.hollyholden.com, specializes in classic and traditional design. I believe in designing once… for a lifetime! Who wouldn’t want to hear those words?  Designing with decorative accessories and techniques that stand the test of time, and enhance your home with little effort, translates to a good investment for your design dollars.  You might have fun implementing them along the way, too!  

Brass Stair Rods:

Something as simple as adding brass stair rods to your carpet runner on a staircase is a timeless decorative detail. Stair rods are appropriate in cottages and castles, and everything in between! You can order them with a clear lacquer finish so that they do not require polishing. When I hosted my public television series, You Are Cordially Invited, I discussed brass stair rods at Highclere Castle, aka Downton Abbey, because they are featured on the main staircase in the castle. It is the finishing touch on any staircase with a carpet runner.

Our brass stair rods have been in place, holding the wool Stark runner, for over twenty years at Fox Hall and have survived three children and numerous dogs... and party traffic on their way up to the ballroom!

Picture Lights: 

Adding picture lights to your artwork, no matter what the genre of art, adds an inviting glow to your walls, especially in the evening light when you entertain. I prefer and specify a matte brass finish for a classically styled picture light. Picture lights work best on framed artwork that does not have glass covering it. When my Stuart and I attended a dinner at Buckingham Palace, it was held in the stupendously handsome Picture Gallery. The main source of light for the evening was from the picture lights atop each painting within the stellar collection of art. The artwork lined the walls salon-style, one on top of another, and was displayed upon the elegant coral damask wall upholstery... a magical and majestic evening!

The soft glow of a picture light  over an oil painting adds a magical ambiance to any room.

Paint the interior of your fireplace black: 

New or naked bricks on the interior of a fireplace need to have the illusion that the fires in the fireplace have created a black patina. There is specialized paint for this endeavor. I specify a flat black for both new and old houses alike. Our historic house, Fox Hall, built in 1803, has seven fireplaces that are naturally blackened from the 217 years of wood fires within them. There is just one which had new bricks replaced in the center... I made sure that the new bricks are now black! Many fireplace examples are featured in my book,The Pretty and Proper Living Room.

The Hunt Room at Fox Hall has wood fires burning quite often during the cold months of New England. Miss Zsa Zsa loves to sit near the warmth in “her” chair!

Darling wastebaskets: 

A decorative detail that is often overlooked for ANY room is a truly darling wastebasket.  My new interior design book, Pearls of Palm Beach, features many examples of adorable wastebaskets in the ‘Darling Detail’ section for each of the eight private houses featured.  Lining a wastebasket with a paper doily is another adorable little detail found in many of the guest bedrooms in the United States and Europe.  Charming wastebaskets can be rawwwther expensive, but well worth it. These little accessories always grace polished interiors. 

Mr. Pink stands proudly in our Hunt Room bathroom at Fox Hall. He was purchased years ago from Scully & Scully in NYC. I am proud to have them as our premiere MMM sponsor. I believe they offer the best selection of wastebaskets ever, including bespoke monogrammed ones... Mr. Pink agrees!

Repurpose decorative items that you already own: 

Shopping in your own house for decorative items to repurpose can be such fun! We were hosting a Chinese themed dinner party and I discovered a box of unused crystal perfume bottles, featuring a cut crystal pagoda top.  Mummy had collected them to give as gifts but never did.  I decided to use them as soy sauce holders!  

Here is another idea that never ceases to garner a smile: use a crystal decanter, normally used for wine or spirits, and pour mouthwash into it to use in a bathroom. For the amusement of your houseguests, fill the decanter with a gold-colored mouthwash, such as Listerine, and then place a silver decanter label, engraved with either “scotch” or “bourbon,” to hang over the decanter neck!

Look closely and you can spy one of the pagoda perfume bottles repurposed for soy sauce at our Chinese themed dinner party.

Fruits & Veggies: A Clever Way To Keep Them Fresh

This is one of my most favorite Katherine Houston ceramic pieces!  The tender asparagus stalks appear as if they are dancing around a maypole. And the pink ribbon of hearts… well, just because!

Summer is the sensational season for flowers and fresh vegetables. They are especially appreciated by those of us living with the “four” seasons of New England!  Mother Nature’s gift of magnificent flowers and vegetables have a natural shelf life and then, voila, sadly they are gone. The clever solution to this natural phenomenon? Well, it comes in another form of brilliant magnificence... masterfully sculpted, beguiling botanical ceramic creations by the stellar artist, Katherine Houston. 

I gave a talk at the charming Chilton Club in Boston, about my first book, The Pretty and Proper Living Room.  My precious friend, and the member who arranged the event, Tita Hyland, also hosted a divine luncheon after the lecture.  To my right, she seated her friend, Katie, as in Katherine Houston.  I was thrilled to get to know Katie, and to learn more about her decorative porcelain artwork, which I have long admired- 18th Century porcelain in the 21st century! We have remained friends ever since. 

What inspired me to share Katherine Houston’s work with you? While passing a local farm stand today, I had that pang, that thought... I do not want summer to end! I adore utilizing the happy harvest of flowers in the house and having colorful veggies displayed in the kitchen. Then, I had an ah-ha moment! I can keep the bounty of summer in the house for all seasons by displaying Katie’s latest creations. Divine fruit and flowers that never lose their beauty and live all year long!

Look at the delicate frilliness on the leaves of the lettuce, the pink bow on the string beans, and the vibrant red onion! They are simply a taste of “summer” on a table.  I have seen pieces similar to these assembled beautifully together on a sideboard in a dining room as an enchanting adornment. An example of this is in my book, Pearls of Palm Beach, in the Irish House chapter. 

Katherine is influenced and inspired by ancient Imperial and Chinese wares, along with those of 18th century Meissen and Sevres. She carries on the tradition of hand-sculpting hard-paste porcelain, using only 18th century colors to hand-paint her masterpiece creations of fruits, vegetables, and flowers. Her work is collected throughout the USA, Europe, South America, and Japan, and her pieces grace prestigious museums. Her work is so prized that The White House commissioned her to create an exclusive work of art, an authentic “American Pumpkin” to be given as State Department gifts. How appropriate, and much more attractive than an American turkey!

Katherine hand-paints her compositions using only 18th century colors. I can imagine this piece, once finished, as a stunning centerpiece on a dining room table. And, it will not require any tending to, only visual appreciation! 

You can see the exquisitely rendered detail in her work. Each piece is quite unique due to its sheer difficulty and complexity.  It is a lengthy process, which can take months, even a year, for her to conceive the envisioned ideal form and balance she requires in her creations. Using white clay from South Carolina, along with her over 300 colors of paint, each creation is one-of-a-kind. On her website, KatherineHouston.com, the fascinating creation process is explained in detail.

The Chelsea Melon is 10” high, and would be ideal on a breakfast table, don’t you think?  If you are short on fruit to serve, no problem…  just dine with your eyes!

These artistic pieces can be displayed just about anywhere in a house. Well, perhaps not in the children’s playroom!  When I spy one of Katherine’s pieces in someone’s house, it never ceases to make me smile. I admire those who can appreciate one-of-a-kind beauty. It is as if Mother Nature left a calling card... created by Katie!

Millennial Tip

Just as a flower arrangement is enhanced with a silver platter or a complimentary porcelain platter under the vase, porcelain fruits, vegetables, and flowers can also be enhanced.

When you purchase one decorative porcelain piece, keep the color scheme of the room in mind, and think about potentially collecting more of the same genre, so that a vignette may be created in the future.  A vignette of several smaller pieces, that are similar in style, can often have more impact than one piece.

Introducing our new sponsor - Sabatino Tartufi!

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Oh, my! We have a truffle TREAT for you! To celebrate their first inclusion in Mummy's Monday Manners, Sabatino Tartufi has been exceptionally kind to offer a 20 % discount exclusively to our MMM subscribers!  

Simply click on the button below and enter code: HOLLYHOLDEN at checkout. 

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Happy Truffling!

Our Interview With Acclaimed Chef Daniel Boulud

The acclaimed Chef Daniel Boulud at Blantyre Hotel in the Berkshires, his recent endeavor to keep a portion of his staff working at this new destination outside of NYC.   Photo credit: Dani Fine Photography Inc.

Introducing French, Michelin-Starred Chef Daniel Boulud!

Have you ever dreamed of having a French, Michelin-starred chef in your kitchen, especially during these mundane quarantine times? Take me away and indulge me in fine-dining, please dear genie! 

Just the sight of fine-dining in a movie inspires Stuart and I to look at one another, and take yet another sip of wine, pretending to partake in the on-screen moment and savor one of our cherished pastimes… dining well. You too?!

Your wish will come true in NYC with a new dining experience that comes to you with the take-out and home-delivery options now offered by the ingenious Chef Daniel Boulud. He has thought of adaptive ways to keep some of his kitchen and staff working while enabling all of us to enjoy his contemporary French classics in our own kitchens or dining rooms during these very challenging Covid times.

Chef Daniel Boulud at his newly invented sidewalk cafe, Restaurant Boulud, NYC, for al fresco dining. 

Chef Daniel Boulud is one of the most revered French chefs in America, with 13 restaurants around the world, and the Feast & Fêtes catering company. He is also the recipient of the prestigious James Beard Award for “Outstanding Chef” and “Outstanding Restaurateur.” And if all of that isn’t impressive enough, Daniel is the author of nine cookbooks and founder of the Michelin-starred Restaurant Daniel in NYC.

Being granted an interview with him was such an honor. I thought of Pavlov’s dog as I began assembling my questions! He swept me away with his passion for cooking, family, staff and ultimately, his loyal customers, along with his commitment to his charities, especially in the wake of Covid. His keen business sense on how to adapt to these challenging times is most commendable.  

So, the moment I heard his enchanting French accent, saw his endearing smile and his chef’s whites, I was immediately transported to a happy place! I hope you will be, too. Napkin in lap, wine glass in hand… let’s commence! 

If you could have only four ingredients in your kitchen, what would you select? 

Ingredients are of course sometimes fancy and sometimes very humble. If I had only four ingredients, for sure I would have potatoes, which come in many forms, textures, types… and I can prepare them in hundreds of ways!  The potato is so French, and being French, it is an important thing for me. 

I use a lot of vegetables in my cooking- I love them all. Growing up as a kid on a farm in France, I think having harvested potatoes... it’s kind of a magical thing. You dig in, lift, and then grab the potato hanging from the roots, picking them one after another… there is nothing more memorable for me. In the spring, the potatoes are still so sweet, freshly made to go with cheese fromage blanc, or in a salad with the walnut oil that we made in the fall from the walnuts. Such fun memories!

Next would be garlic because garlic is healthy and tasty.  Sometimes you don’t know it is there, and sometimes you really know it’s there... I really love that!  Again on the farm, garlic was an important thing, as we harvested two and a half tons of garlic, sweet garlic, a year.  And we made bread with garlic, which I would do. We used to always eat a lot of garlic, and of course, in the potato salad, there is always a clove of garlic crushed a bit with salt, made into paste and put into the dressing… from my humble roots as a farm boy. 

Olive oil is a very important ingredient for me.  There is butter, of course. Being French, there are many other forms of fat, but I think of all the fat, the one I use the most, the one I love the most, is olive oil. Based on where the olive oil comes from, it is interesting to see if they are sharp, or sort of sweet, if there is a fragrance, or how smooth. I cherish many dishes which I often start cooking by using olive oil.  

I am not from Provence, but I have practiced Mediterranean cuisine for quite a long time, and I am in love with that cuisine.  I pay homage to Mediterranean cuisine from my time in Provence. So, olive oil definitely gave me a sense of direction, and a sense of home and health as well. 

The fourth ingredient would be eggs because if I can do hundreds of recipes with potatoes, I can do thousands of recipes with eggs!  Eggs are the protein for me. For breakfast with my young family, we all have an egg every morning! I think eggs are so versatile, so affordable, and eggs are so important in much of the cooking and baking in every culture. There is always a use for eggs.  And If I use the potato, the garlic, the olive oil, and the eggs… I can make an amazing Spanish frittata, or an amazing potato egg pie. 

What is your ultimate comfort food? 

My favorite comfort food is when I can make it a one-pot meal.  Some roasting, then some braising, some simmering. It is something you can put in the middle of the table and everybody can enjoy it as much as they want… that is comfort!  Either a beef stew, chicken stew... I love stew so much that I wrote a book called Braise, which you can find online.  I think braising for me is the ultimate comfort food because, you know, you take your time. It always brings the full flavor in the house, and brings a lot of joy at the table. As you walk in the house, oh my God, it smells so good… it is beautiful! Be inspired and start to cook some wonderful, soulful dishes.

(Oh my, I’m really inspired now, how about you?!)

Was your mother a stickler about any manners in particular as you grew up on your family farm near Lyon, France? 

Living on a farm, there was the well-being of the home, and the well-being of the farm. We didn’t mix the two. We were raising chickens, dogs, and all kinds of things. We loved our dogs on the farm, but the dogs were not allowed into the house. For us, the dogs were happier to be living outside. I respected that- this was a line not to be crossed!

It was very important that there was no distraction during a meal. The mealtime was very, very important and precise.  There was no television, iPad, and no one had an excuse to miss a mealtime.  Lunch was always at 12:30, and dinner at 7:30 pm. No one had an excuse to be late or to get up without having the meal being complete. Keeping up the conversation was expected. Mealtime was an important ritual. Now, if I am working and can’t be home, my wife reads books to our children during the meal or tells them stories to keep them occupied in front of their plates.  And as you know, teaching manners to children is so important… but it is also so difficult!

(Alleluia, to those sage words!) 



Chef Daniel’s exemplary commitment to his charities, especially during Covid times, and serving meals to over 125,000 volunteers, hospitals, nurses and doctors, food banks and shelters, is most admirable. 

Food 1st  is a non-profit organization preparing thousands of meals for organizations such as Citymeals on Wheels, The Bowery Mission, as well as local hospitals, nurses, and first responders.

Hand in Hand is a foundation the chef started in March to support his employees who have not been able to work.

Chef Daniel Boulud is a visionary who has touched many lives with his talent and love of life! Tres Bon et merci beaucoup, Chef Daniel!

I would also like to thank Courtney Silver,  my talented Director of Business Development, for arranging and participating in the interview with Chef Daniel and me! 

P.S. Perhaps you know others who enjoy cooking and are dining “foodies” and would be interested in Chef Daniel’s words too? Please forward this newsletter along to them and inspire them to sign up!

Introducing NivenBreen!

What an honor it is to introduce you to my stupendously talented, New York based communications and brand consulting firm, Nivenbreen! They have successfully launched and continues to politely promote my new book, Pearls of Palm Beach. They specialize in developing strategies for luxury lifestyle and design companies... my audience! The co-founders, Chesie Breen and Ellen Niven, have a distinguished roster of worldwide clients and 25 years of combined industry experience in the home, design, fashion, jewelry, hospitality, and publishing sectors. 

Dining Al Fresco!

At Fox Hall as the sun was setting and the candles added their magic touch!

Ala von Auersperg and Dining Al Fresco! 

Have you ever wondered what to wear to a particular function, then get there and wish you had worn something else? How comforting it is to discover a clothing line that can be worn to a multitude of functions!

How lovely it was to be invited to wear one of Ala von Auersperg’s colorful creations and be part of her “At Home with the Women of AvA,” which was an article celebrating entertaining al fresco! Ala paints her own designs, which are then magically transformed into flowing fabrics that adorn her fashionable clothing line. Her goal is to create clothes that are “effortless, yet elegant and versatile, and can be glamorous, no matter the size or the age of the lady wearing them!” That solves the question of what to wear!  

I chose the Mary Short Kaftan in the print Jaipur to wear to a summer dinner party on our verandah at Fox Hall. It had just the right amount of hot pink accents and movement in the sleeves that reminded me of a summer breeze... or a very large butterfly!  

My new Ala von Auersperg dress was a joy to wear for our al fresco dining! 

Here are my answers to the questions posed to me for the AvA article about dining al fresco:

Favorite things about dining al fresco? 

Dining al fresco adds such a charming dimension that only nature can provide one’s senses: sight, sound, and the lovely fragrance of the garden!

Something you like to do to create ambiance?

My husband and I enhance nature’s gifts at Fox Hall (c.1803) with the sound of two fountains: one on the brick terrace and one as the focal point at the opposite end of the yard from the verandah. That is our form of music! The experience of dining outside is made so much lovelier with the sound of the water, serving as a quietly elegant backdrop, along with the sun setting, and later, the stars sparkling above. 

Favorite location for entertaining al fresco? 

My family used to have drinks on the verandah, and then dinner down below on the brick terrace next to the historic “Alexandre” marble fountain. But, since our family has grown in size, we now have a table on the verandah which seats ten. This is where we serve dinner most often. There is something quite beautiful, and almost transportive experience when surrounded by 40’ white columns. My heart is filled with gratitude for the honor of being the stewards of this historic house. I wish I had a crystal ball so that I could see the other dinners that were enjoyed on the same verandah on warm summer evenings over the past two hundred and twenty years! 

Colors that you always gravitate towards for a Summer table? 

I adore wearing my signature color pink, which also translates to implementing a pink and green color scheme when I set an outdoor table! My darling husband, Stuart, has designed our gardens and urns to feature pink and white flowers so that cutting them for the arrangements on the table is a snap. Miraculously, the flowers always seem to match my table design!

A drink you like to have before entertaining? A drink you love to serve? 

 Stuart and I enjoy wine! We love to start a celebratory evening with champagne. My favorite is Cristal Cuvee by Louis Roederer. For casual evenings, a chilled bottle of Rombauer Chardonnay to start, and on to a red French Bordeaux wine which my husband chooses to complement the dinner. 

Signature style to your table settings? 

For ambiance, one can never have too many white votive candles, which I place in cut crystal glasses for sparkle, along with my Mummy’s tall, silver candlesticks that are crowned with glass hurricanes. This helps the candle from being blown out by soft summer breezes. 

One topic that I have discussed before, in a previous MMM newsletter, is the elegant use and placement of linen napkins. I adore large, well-starched dinner-sized, monogrammed napkins… many of which I inherited from Mummy. 

I also enjoy shopping around the house for various decorative porcelain pieces to either complement the guest of honor, or the flowers that grace the table. From pairs of Herend bunnies to antique Foo dogs, Meissen parakeets, silver foxes, or a medley of Limoges boxes, I savor the creative aspect of designing a table that is uniquely clever. I have even used Beatrix Potter figurines at every place setting, each one representing the personality of a guest. I asked the guests to figure out who they were and to choose their own figurine. Voila, that is where they were seated! It always makes for some lively conversation to commence the party! 

A question that I ask myself the day of the event: Is it worth the extra work? 

I do have to admit that dining outside is more work than hosting a dinner party inside... that is for sure! From setting up a table in the atmospheric venue of choice to bringing all the table-setting accouterments outside, transporting the food to the setting, dealing with weather elements, attempting to have a bug free dining experience, and choosing the right candle holders so that the flames will not blow out… all of which begs the question, is it worth the extra work? Inevitably, while I am dining al fresco, engaged in jolly laughter, seeing the happy candlelit faces around the table with the stars sparkling above, and savoring the sound of wine being poured, my answer is yes indeed, it is worth the extra effort to entertain outside! 

I love to create a table and an evening that sings to everyone the joy that I feel in their company. Friends are gifts that we give ourselves. Now, during Covid quarantine times, this rings even more true and sweeter than ever! 

P.S.  Would you be so kind as to share this newsletter with a friend or two, and encourage them to sign up? If you are inspired to read my new book, Pearls of Palm Beach, it is available on Amazon. There are also signed copies at Scully & Scully in NYC. 

WELCOME, NEW SPONSOR! 

If you are on a search to find the perfect piece to complete a room or discover a diamond in the rough, take a peek at Kofski Antiques in Palm Beach, along with their Estate Sales On-Line division. They have been in business for over eighty years, achieving great success as a leader in antique and estate sales. It is easy to shop virtually if you cannot get to Palm Beach and they ship anywhere!

Behind-the-scenes: Pearls of Palm Beach, Chapters 5-8

The Chinese porcelain is right at home in front of the Chinese mural painted in The John Volk House, Chapter 5. 

Behind-the-scenes: Pearls of Palm Beach, Chapters 5-8!

How effortless it is to fall under the enchanting spell of Palm Beach! To me, there is something magical about the tall, manicured hedges that conceal many of the houses. You just know there is a treasure hidden behind them. I wanted my book, Pearls of Palm Beach, to feel like a private invitation into eight timeless and tailored houses… which indeed it is! As a designer, I find that I can read the personality, interests, and background of a homeowner just by seeing a few interior design details. I knew the houses I chose would introduce and reflect stunningly accomplished people who cherish their families and know how to entertain with polished finesse. To me, these houses are eminently inviting and mesmerizingly memorable!

Here is a little peek at the behind-the-scenes for the last four chapters in my book:

Chapter Five, John Volk House:

Cassandra, a dear family friend, extended a kind invitation to brunch for my family and guests that were in Palm Beach attending my son’s wedding. This is when and where I became inspired to write the book! 

Cassandra instinctively knows how to restore and renovate historic properties while honoring their intrinsic charm and smart decorative appointments. This is especially true with her John Volk house. John Volk was a talented architect who came from New York to Palm Beach in the 1920s and is noted for his Bermudian as well as Georgian-revival style. The loggia walls were adorned with a bespoke shell crown moulding, which captivated me at that brunch. I asked Cassandra if I could photograph the shells… which then commenced the creation of my book!

My husband Stuart and I had the privilege of staying in one of Cassandra’s Nantucket houses for a week one summer. Painted on the dining room walls of her in town house, she commissioned a mural of the Hongs along the Pearl River in Canton, China in blues and golds, complementing the historic aspect of the house. In the dining room in Palm Beach, she had an artist use soft, muted colors for the bespoke trompe l'oeil mural of the Yangtze River, where she had just traveled, blending the muted colors within the house together like spices in a gourmet delicacy.

Lesson:

When you travel, think about bringing back the visions that inspire you. Recreate them in some form in your house. This is a delightful way to encapsulate your experiences.

I adore the handsome dining room in The John Volk House. If you look closely, you will spy the bespoke shell crown moulding in the distant green loggia.

Chapter Six, La Maison Jolie!:

A private invitation is to be cherished, and upon entering the former 18th Prime Minister of Canada, Brian Mulroney’s, charming Palm Beach abode, I just knew I was in for a treat. I relished the idea of sharing the experience with the readers of my forthcoming book! 

The facade of the house greeted me with a sunny yellow paint color, along with a traditional french blue accent color on the doors and shutters. The moment that I met Mila Mulroney, Brian’s wife, I immediately felt her genuine warmth and charm. They also had their darling and very polite grandchildren visiting, who were page boys and a bridesmaid in the royal wedding of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle!  

Mila has a gift for color, design, and fashion… and it shows. Upon entering the house, I instantly absorbed the comforting feeling of family and friendship. The predominant colors throughout the entire house were just yellow and blue, along with occasional touches of red. I felt as if I was in a Claude Monet painting: a field of scattered red poppies with a bright blue sky and the sunshine above! There was a lengthy sliding glass door in the dining room. It was wide open, exposing the terrace pool, as we photographed. Talk about bringing the outside in. It was a most glorious sight! Seriously decadent for a northerner visiting during winter! 

Lesson: 

Consider designing interior and exterior spaces using just two colors, and sprinkle in a complementary color as an accent. This technique translates especially well in smaller-scaled houses, where the thread of two colors knows no boundaries.

Such an attractive display of blue and white porcelain with yellow walls, and a pop of red, in chapter 6, La Maison Jolie! 

Chapter Seven, Lake House:

When I first met Kit Pannill in Palm Beach, I instinctively knew she was from Richmond by her Virginian accent. Yes, indeed, we found out that we attended the same girls’ school! Lake House is the second John Volk designed house in my book, and this one sits splendidly on a property overlooking Lake Worth.  

Kit’s late husband, Bill, was world-renowned for his daffodil hybridization, with over 200 varieties registered. And Kit is an extremely accomplished orchid, horticultural judge for the Garden Club of America. She designed the most magnificent orchid “slat house” on the island, and worked alongside Leta Austin Foster, the noted Palm Beach designer, to decorate much of her house. I started to notice the faintest hint and reference to flowers in various aspects of the decorative details inside Lake House… but nothing too overt. It was such a treat to secretly search for these references in unexpected places, such as the carpet pattern, porcelain, artwork, and even the antique chair seat upholstery. It was similar to a “Where’s Waldo” experience, enhancing the interiors with a personal touch. 

Lesson:

 Whether you are passionate about collecting something, or you have a hobby that gives you pleasure, think about having an understated nod to the same subject matter within some of the decorative details in your house. These personal touches are what distinguish a house with your personality.
 

Look closely at the petite flowers in the design on the antique Baltimore chair upholstery in Chapter 7, Lake House. 

Chapter Eight, Pink House:

A pink Bermudian-style house, which overlooks the Atlantic Ocean… well, just pinch me! Mary created this inviting house, along with the assistance of Leta Austin Foster’s design talent. The handsome fanlight above the front door on this twenty-year-old house adds a sense of architectural permanence. 

Meeting Mary for the first time inside the spacious front hall, I felt like I had known her forever. She was off to a meeting at The Society of the Four Arts as the co-chair of the biennial gala.  She knows how to raise money by hosting stupendous events- she is a seasoned hostess. The soft pastel colors both inside and outside of the house appealed to me. Mary and I are both blondes, and naturally, are attracted to muted spring colors. Usually, the colors in your wardrobe, that you gravitate to and that make you feel pretty, are the colors that work well for your interior design. 

Mary has an extensive collection of Dodie Thayer cabbage-ware porcelain, which is SO Palm Beach! The collection added a marvelous pop of green color splendidly to the Gracie wallpaper gracing the dining room.

Lessons: 

Think about colors that you are naturally attracted to wear in your wardrobe, and use them for inspiration in your design scheme.

Collect a particular kind of porcelain that speaks to your heart, and build on the collection. It can travel to any room, or any house for that matter, and is an instant starting point when deciding on a decorative theme or color scheme for a room.

The Dodie Thayer collection of cabbage porcelain in The Pink House Chapter 8, confirms one is indeed in Palm Beach! 

P.S. If you enjoyed this newsletter, I do hope you will be inspired to read my new book, Pearls of Palm Beach. And, I would be most grateful if you would share this newsletter with a friend or two, and encourage them to sign up!

WELCOME, NEW SPONSOR! 

There is nothing like a mother/daughter duo! Jeanne and Christie, from the Shenandoah Valley in Virginia, share a passion for the history of classic vintage pieces, which they hand-select for their clients. Some of their silver pieces are my kind of go-to gifts for bridal showers and birthdays.

Behind-the-scenes: Pearls of Palm Beach, Chapters 1-4

Behind-the-scenes: Pearls of Palm Beach, Chapters 1-4!

The tall arrangement of Casa Blanca lilies in the center of the Brauer’s glorious dining room inside The English House was sheer perfection. The elegant reticulated silver tray underneath the base of the vase offers practical footing and adds a timeless touch.

Introducing my new book, Pearls of Palm Beach, has been such an honor and a brilliant experience; I am simply overjoyed at how well it has been received! Thank you all for your enthusiastic support and kind words. And, my appreciation is extended to NivenBreen PR in NYC, who has done a brilliant job with the official release of the book!

As promised on my Instagram posts, here are some behind-the-scenes stories in reference to the first four house chapters:

Chapter One, The English House:
Stuart and I were invited to a CEO.org private dinner party at Daniel Boulud in NYC. (Stay tuned, Chef Boulud has agreed to do a Q&A for an upcoming newsletter!) Seated to my left was Stephen F. Brauer, the former Ambassador to Belgium, along with his charming wife, Kimmy. Steve and I began to discuss our shared enthusiasm for attending and buying at auctions. We also spoke of the importance of furnishing a house that tells a story about the interests of the homeowner, which is exactly what encapsulates the Brauer’s homes. I reached out to them about photographing The English House, their residence in Palm Beach, which they kindly agreed to!

Upon entering the house, the fragrance of white Casa Blanca lilies and peach-colored Osiana roses greeted me in the most elegant way. The captivating fragrance was subtly intoxicating. Each room featured these two flowers, majestically arranged.  All of the vases were graced with a silver tray underneath, framing the arrangement.  Mummy taught me this technique too, as the silver tray creates an understated, faint reflection of the flowers and the vase, as well as good footing, and if large enough, a place to collect unwanted pollen.

Lessons:
Place a silver, or porcelain, tray underneath your floral arrangements. 
Arrangements featuring just one variety of flowers are elegant in their quiet simplicity.

Chapter Two, The Irish House:
The Brian P. Burns Collection of Irish Art is one of the most extensive private collections outside of Ireland. The art inside of The Irish House is stunning and is displayed upon colorful walls, as well as on other surfaces. Eileen has a keen eye for color, and her dining room table features flowers that enhance the table setting, along with an important Irish sculpture that echoes the art theme in the house. This is a wonderful idea to consider when setting a table! 

When I first met Eileen, I brought her a little cookbook, just published by my Garden Club of Hartford members, as a thank you.  A few nights later, when invited to dinner, I met her talented French chef who prepared a glorious sole almondine for us that evening. I thought to myself, how kind she was to accept my little gift so graciously because obviously, the chef did not need the cookbook. But, who knows, perhaps the chef may have enjoyed reading our tried-and-true homemade recipes!  

Lessons: 
Use a sculpture or something of interest as your dining table centerpiece. 
Accept gifts with genuine appreciation, even if you do not use them or need them.

Chapter Three, The Lucky House: 
A few years ago, while on a walk before attending a wedding at The Breakers in Palm Beach, I discovered a gem-box store: Lori Jayne. The window display of darling preppy embroidered pillows and elegant linens stopped me in my tracks. Lori and I became friends and she sweetly hosted a book signing party for my first book, The Pretty & Proper Living Room. She served her signature drink, the Bellini, which is also the name of her Malti-Poo! 

The Bellini was created by Giuseppe Cipriani, of the legendary Harry’s Bar in Venice, in 1948. And it was in the loggia of Hotel Cipriani where Lori and her husband Michael discovered the latticework walls, with mirrors behind them. They chose to replicate the design, but to use a chocolate brown color behind their handsome white lattice covered walls to complement the Brunschwig & Fils, La Portugaise chintz on the club chairs in their family room.
 
Lesson: 
When creating a room with crisp white latticework on the walls, have fun and use a unique background color to complement the color scheme!

An attractive room to serve drinks in at The Lucky House, which features a clever texture on the walls- latticework!

Chapter Four, The Preppy Condo
When I filmed my television episode with Lady Carnarvon at Highclere Castle, aka Downton Abbey, I was enamored with the bespoke carpet she had made for the well known library. Due to the tourist traffic in the castle, a new carpet had to be created, and Fiona had her initial F, along with her husband’s initial G, intertwined as a monogram and discreetly woven into one side of the border of the carpet. 

So, when I entered into the master bedroom of The Preppy Condo, I was enchanted to discover a charming white linen chair, which featured Karen and Brent’s monogram beautifully embroidered in a soft blue to complement their heavenly blue retreat. Sadly, dear Brent has since passed away, but this sweet chair remains a treasure for Karen.

Lesson:  
Think about monogramming something as a decorative detail in your house, other than just silver, a pillow or on linens.

P.S.  If you enjoyed this newsletter, I do hope you will be inspired to share it with one or two of your friends, so they too will sign up!  In Mummy’s words, “The more, the merrier!”

Announcing the Release of Pearls of Palm Beach

It Is Here!  Announcing the Release of My New Book "Holly Holden's Pearls of Palm Beach"
 

What a joyous moment to share with you! 

I am simply elated to introduce my second book, Pearls of Palm Beach: A secret peek into eight elegant, timeless & tailored houses!

A private invitation is to be cherished, right? Well, when you open this book, you are invited to take a rare peek into eight privately owned, refined Palm Beach houses… an invitation to be treasured!  

Like a classic string of pearls, you will experience the elegant essence of quiet understatement that radiates from each page and is revealed through the hundreds of photographs. These family houses are not overly done-up and glitzy, but are joyful, charming, and enchanting in their quiet sophistication. As you step foot into each front door, the inviting atmosphere will envelope you within the magical world that the homeowners have created. The interiors are timeless and tailored. You will discover the quintessential decorative “darling details,” that are the elements which contribute to the endearing aspects found in these traditional Palm Beach houses.

This book is a lesson for lovely living. Pearls of Palm Beach captures the delicious moments that make them such! Not only are these family homes, they also have revolving doors for elegant entertaining during “the season.”

I am forever grateful to the generous hospitality of each homeowner that has since become a darling friend after graciously opening their doors to me... and now to you. They are the real pearls!

Lady Henrietta Spencer-Churchill, an internationally renowned interior designer, kindly wrote the foreword, for which I am most grateful. We created an episode together for my public television series in her childhood home, Blenheim Palace, a World-Heritage Site in England. Her classic design aesthetic, along with her long family history in Palm Beach, are noteworthy. I am also appreciative of Leta Foster Austin, the notable Palm Beach designer, who wrote a lovely excerpt for the book. I am beholden to my exceptionally talented book designer, Alexandra Folino,  who graced every page with her expertise and creative genius, and I was pleased to work alongside Dean Greenblatt, my photographer.

How very jubilant I am to walk you through each of these glorious houses! I truly hope you will enjoy reading this book as much as I cherished writing and recording the detailed interiors featured across its pages.

These very private doors are now open for you... do come in!  

In the Lake House chapter, Kit Pannil’s magnificent, utilitarian-working treillage, called “Slat House,” is where she tends to her orchids (over 200!) during the winter months.

This dining room is regally set in English House, home of former Belgian Ambassador, Stephen F. Brauer, and his wife, Kimmy, who host formal dinners often.

A comfortable family room in Le Maison Jolie, the home of Mila and Brian Mulroney, the 18th Prime Minister of Canada, where the family reads and relaxes.

PS: The book is available through amazon.com, and signed copies are available through Scully & Scully, Park Avenue, NYC.  And please join me on Instagram (@hollyholdendesign) as I highlight aspects of the book. 

Anecdotes, which were not included in the book, will be revealed in next week's newsletter!

Elizabeth Gage’s Insight Into Jewelry Etiquette

My daughter Alexandra and I had a stupendous meeting, two years ago, with Elizabeth Gage at her charming Belgravia shop in London. The abundance of flowers surrounding the entrance door set the scene for the beautiful and bountiful collection of her stunning jewels inside. 

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Elizabeth Gage's Insight Into Jewelry Etiquette! 

It was a grand pleasure and honor to host a dinner party at Fox Hall five years ago for Elizabeth Gage, the renowned, award-winning British jewelry designer! She came over from England to open “The Enchanting Jewels” exhibit, featuring 180 pieces of her gold and stone creations at The New Britain Museum of American Art in Connecticut. My husband Stuart and I have remained friends with her ever since. Her artistic gift has created the most divine “statement jewelry” that has been exhibited and admired globally. 

The moment you meet Elizabeth, her genius is palpable and her delightful personality engaging.  She is intoxicatingly captivating, yet humble about her MBE, the order of the British Empire award appointed by Her Majesty The Queen. Her patrons are discriminating and sophisticated, collecting her pieces with passion. Her gift for creativity in jewelry design is also evident in her interior design flair, that you will certainly notice in her gem-box store in Belgravia, London. Elizabeth has a charming country house outside of London, which is slated to be the next episode for my television series, as we search for a sponsor.  

I asked Elizabeth to share her thoughts on the etiquette of properly wearing jewels at various English functions and venues, which I think you, too, will find alluring and insightful! (Please note that the English spelling is jewellery.) 

Here are her charming responses:  

"Jewellery is the ultimate expression of one's individuality. Wearing jewellery that you truly love is empowering. Curating a collection that does exactly that should be cherished and requires patience. My philosophy as a designer is wearability and timeless elegance. Jewellery should be worn from day into night, and become a second skin for its wearer. Jewellery, for me, has a talismanic quality which means that it should always be timeless, handed down and cherished through the generations to follow.”  

Royal Ascot – if you are a keen racegoer then you are at the course for the horses and not to be seen; ergo jewellery should be understated.

Formal Event – if you are going and the Royals are attending, then any jewellery can be worn, but remember you cannot compete with Her Majesty The Queen. 

Gala evenings – such as Royal Opera House or Royal Ballet – the blingier the sparkle the better.  (I adore that remark!)

Weddings – guests can wear what they like as long as it goes with the outfit.  

One tradition, that is continuing, is the gift from the bride and groom to the bridesmaids. This can be anything from earrings, to a pretty necklace, to a ring. (Note in England that groomsmen are not the norm. The groom has ushers, but they are not paired up with the bridesmaids for the ceremony.) 

Since Queen Victoria’s reign, every royal bride has a sprig of myrtle in her wedding bouquet.

Diamonds - traditionally they were not worn until after lunch unless on the finger. Today, the trend seems to be that anything goes, and no longer does jewellery need to be worn as a set.

Hosting guests at home - depending on who the people are, whether they love diamonds or not, choose something unusual such as a fish pin hanging from the tube necklace. You can put any piece hanging from it, and it looks wonderful for any level of dressing up or down.

I personally advocate Elizabeth’s suggestion that jewelry should be cherished, handed down to future generations, and that it has a talismanic quality… which brings magic powers and good luck. Thank you, dear Elizabeth. We can all use a touch of that in our lives, along with the allure of sparkle!  

New Sponsors!

It is an honour to have Elizabeth Gage, one of the most influential jewellery designers of the last five decades, as a sponsor. Elizabeth is an artist who uses gold and precious stones instead of brushes and paint. Her creations are magically magnificent!

Mandarin Garnet Kiss Pin

Proper Funeral Etiquette - Part II

White flowers are the most appropriate to send for a funeral. This arrangement of white roses at Fox Hall have opened up so beautifully that they almost do not look real. 

The Farewell Finale: 
 

Funeral Etiquette Part II - Appropriate attire, church etiquette, and acknowledgment notes

What to wear to a funeral:  
 

You know this! When attending a funeral, it is most appropriate to wear conservative attire, preferably in black.

Gentlemen, wear a dark suit, dark tie, black socks and well-polished shoes. (The importance of polished shoes is my father's military background speaking, and it is applicable to women’s shoes, too.)

Ladies, wear black or dark attire. Queen Elizabeth II, and other lady members of the royal family, will always have a black outfit (along with gloves and a matching black hat, mind you), which are packed in their suitcase whilst traveling in case of an emergency mourning. I learned the hard way, as a young bride, when I attended a distant relative’s funeral service at the National Cathedral in Washington, D.C., with dignitaries and the Vice President present. Almost every lady had a black suit or dress on. Since I had been traveling prior to the funeral, I did not have a black dress packed. I wore a solid-colored, conservative dress, which was pale pink. I vowed then to purchase the perfect black funeral outfit to always have on hand, but not necessarily always in my suitcase… and I did!  

Note: A “memorial service” is typically more relaxed than a funeral. The burial has already taken place, so you may wear colors other than black.

Considerate funeral etiquette in a church:  
 

-Be on time, and arrive early before the ceremony commences.

-Put your mobile phone on silent before entering the church. 

-Keep your conversation with others decorously muted.

-Be respectful of religious customs. If it is a kneeling service, and you do not wish to kneel, bow your head and lean forward.

Know which side of the aisle to sit: 
 

The immediate family sits up front, on the right side of the church aisle, in the first set of pews.  The pews are customarily designated by flowers, a ribbon or a sign placed on the pew seat.  Directly behind them is where the close relatives and very dear friends are seated. 

Other friends, acquaintances and colleagues sit on either the right or the left side of the church.

Tearful goodbyes: 

No matter how stoic you think you will be, heartfelt emotions sometimes surprise us. Ladies, it is a good idea to carry a clean and pressed handkerchief in your purse. I still use a few beautifully embroidered hankies that once belonged to Mummy, and also, some pretty pink monogrammed ones which were given to me as a gift. I always carry one when attending a funeral. (A pretty handkerchief is a sweet gift idea to give to friends who have everything.) 

And gentlemen, tuck a white, well-pressed linen handkerchief in your coat pocket to offer to a family member or friend for their tender tears. My husband, Stuart, has this chivalrous gesture down pat, and believe me, it is most appreciated by ladies who forget to bring something to wipe their tears. And yes, he insists they keep it. Alternatively, offer a paper Kleenex tissue, especially during COVID.
 

Acknowledgment notes: 

An acknowledgment note is, in essence, a note of appreciation to those who have extended kindness and condolences to you. It is a funeral thank you note, sent from the family who lost the loved one, written to those who either gave flowers, a donation, was a pallbearer, brought food, assisted the family or guests with hospitality, or whatever was deemed as a kind gesture.  They do not need to be written to someone who just sent a note or card. 

Typically, an acknowledgment note is sent out within a month of the funeral. Of course, this can be difficult for someone who is grieving, and it may take more time. One option is to ask a family member or relative to write them on your behalf. In fact, when you write a sympathy note to a dear friend, it is thoughtful to express that no acknowledgment is necessary, especially when you know they have so many condolences to attend to.  

There are two kinds of acknowledgment notes: the preprinted note, which can be sent without a handwritten note, or a handwritten note on white or ecru writing paper and notecards. Again, black ink is de rigueur. 

Preprinted notes usually mention “the family of” the deceased within the text. For example: Your kind expression of sympathy and friendship will always remain in our memories. Thank you for your thoughtfulness. The Family of... name of the deceased.

Follow up with more love:

Within the first few weeks, and even months, after a funeral, call to see how the family is doing. Invite them to dinner, or bring dinner to them. Genuinely follow up with your offers to help in any way needed. 

When you encounter a friend who has lost a loved one, it is kind to mention the person who has died, and not ignore the fact as if it never happened. One of my darling subscribers, Mary, who just retired from the medical world, suggested that I mention this. She knows, from experience,  how much people appreciate you remembering their loved ones. 

I would be interested to hear about your funeral traditions. Please share them with me.

Forbidden faux pas:

No-no: Taking photographs at the funeral or burial service.

No-no: Not to have a sparkling clean car when attending a funeral, especially if you are driving in a funeral procession. You are honouring the dead and their family, so look your best and drive a clean car! 

No-no: If you see a funeral procession of cars, to cut into the line or block the procession. Be respectful and remember that the cars in the procession are dealing with grief.

No-no: To refer to the person who has died as “the late” so-and-so before the funeral has taken place. Only AFTER the funeral can the deceased be referred to as, “the late Mr. Churchill,” for example.

New Sponsors!

These days, wearing a mask is as much about your safety as it is the safety of others. Wearing one can also be part of your chic ensemble! May I introduce you to one of my new favorite clothing companies, Alva von Auersperg? In her words, Stay safe & stylish, wherever the day takes you. The mask that I am wearing is the Camellia print in cotton voile, with a fabric-covered elastic band. It is the perfect texture for summer and the pink design works joyfully with my wardrobe, for certain!  Ala von Auersperg designs clothing that is casually elegant, unabashedly feminine and vibrant. The pretty, pretty fabric prints are custom created by Ala’s hand. Her darling new boutique at 312 Worth Avenue in Palm Beach will be seeing even more of me during my Palm Beach book launch. Take a peek at the styles she has to offer... she knows how to adapt to flatter a woman’s body and spirit at any age. Alleluia to that!

My Jack Russell, Miss Zsa Zsa, thought my new Aka von Auersperg mask complemented her collar brilliantly.