The quintessential guide to classic interior design, elegant entertaining & a genteel lifestyle.
(formerly Mummy's Monday Manners)
For our son’s 40th birthday party, we had our favorite bagpiper to commence the evening and over 100 guests came to celebrate! We invited his Rollins College friends to gather by the bagpiper for a photograph together. (Our son, Stuart III, is the fourth gentleman down the steps, and our daughter, Caroline, is at the bottom of the steps!)
Isn’t it divine to be able to visit and party with friends in their homes again after the endlessly long covid hiatus? So many people have refreshed their interiors, which in turn, serves to enchant newly invited guests. In this world of just about “anything and everything” being captured on cell phone cameras, I wanted to shed light on an important forbidden faux pas for a guest. It is a BIG no-no to go around someone’s house and photograph different aspects of their interiors.
Interiors are private. Taking the liberty to snap a few photos while inside someone’s house for your own pleasure, is tantamount to photographing someone nude when no one is looking! You may capture something pretty, but in a civilized society, it’s not yours to capture.
Consider that one’s interiors are exclusive and should remain privy to the owners. A photograph becomes a permanent record, one that the owner of the house no longer has control of. From hidden security cameras, art, and antiques, there are facets of a house that one may wish not to share, or may choose to present in a more appropriate or proper manner.
Yes, there are indeed occasions when a guest can photograph inside a home. I have happily witnessed guests capturing memorable videos of the bagpiper we have playing to commence a celebratory party, or apres fireworks on the terrace. Guests may wish to photograph one another too. And yes, the background of the interiors are in the photograph. The difference is that you are not attempting to solely photograph interior rooms and the details (like a spy) without the consent of the owner.
But, if you DO wish to photograph something in particular, present your wish with an open-ended question: “Someday, I would love to take a few photographs of this stunning room.” Being tactful will enable the owner to either ignore or grant the request.
A few years ago, I posed this question to a friend in Palm Beach upon seeing her spectacular “seashell crown-molding” in a study. Guess what? She called me two weeks later and said she had just sold her house, and if I wanted to photograph it, I had a week to get down there. I most certainly did… and that was the beginning of my Pearls of Palm Beach book!
How divine and appropriate is this bespoke shell crown molding which is in a John Volk designed house in Palm Beach, which I featured as a chapter in my Palm Beach book?
Grandmillennial Tip:
If you take photographs in someone’s house, reassure them that you will not share any of them on social media, or at least not without their prior approval.
How grateful I am that so many of my cherished friends have allowed me to photograph their stunning, family homes for inclusion into my two interior design books. Their trust alone is beyond pure gold, and means the world to me!
XX
Holly
P.S. Please be a dear…share this with a friend and inspire them to subscribe!
Please meet our sponsors!
Scully & Scully is the oldest, most renowned, and most elegant boutique business on Park Avenue. Stepping into the store you feel like Royalty, and justifiably so! Scully & Scully has had a clientele of royalty, first ladies, and international stars since its very beginning in 1934.
When I receive NYSD in my inbox, perusing through it is always such a treat. Finding out what is going on in splendid venues, seeing friends, colleagues and clientele, learning about what is happening in New York City and Palm Beach, complemented with delicious writing and party photographs, is a moment to indulge in, and savor!
Holly's Emmy Award Winning TV Series
Holly Holden is an interior designer specializing in classic design internationally since 1989. She is an author, speaker, host and producer of an Emmy nominated public television series!